WhatsApp Status: Currently unavailable. Please leave a message I will read and not reply to for several days.

WhatsApp Status: I’m not a complete idiot—some parts are missing, but the core foundation is solid.

WhatsApp Status: If life gives you lemons, check the receipt. You might be able to trade them for tacos.

WhatsApp Status: My house was clean last week. Sorry you missed it.

WhatsApp Status: Today’s forecast: 99% chance of nonsense.

WhatsApp Status: Typing… deleting… overthinking… repeat.